You walked down stairs wearing a pair of frilly panties and a too-big white button down shirt, whose owner was nowhere to be found. "Arthur?" you called.
"I'm in the kitchen, love," he called back.
You bounded happily to the kitchen and leaned over the table, staring at him seductively. "You know, you owe me a new pair of panties because someone ripped mine last night."
Arthur eyed you from the corner of his eye and smirked. "I can get you more than just a pair of sweet-nothings, pet." He handed you a plate filled with all your favorite breakfast food. "Go on, try it!" he exclaimed cheerfully.
Your mouth watered. Everything looked and smelled so good, you didn't know where to start! You finally eyed some (favorite breakfast food) and decided to go with that first. Arthur watched you intently as you harpooned the food, ready to pop it in your mouth...
When suddenly your alarm rang. You were late for work, and your boss was gonna throw a fit like an enraged Englishwoman. "Holy Roman Empire!" you shouted, dropping your food. "I'm so sorry, Arthur! I have to go now!" You rushed through your routine and headed out the door and into your, trying not to get yourself killed in the process.
Arthur stood looking very annoyed and red in the face. "Blast," he cursed, putting everything away. "It seems I shall have to try something else."
"I have to go to work now, darling!" You called as Arthur sat in the living room drinking his favorite tea.
"Be careful," he called with a smirk you didn't see. "Ha, be very very careful, dear..."
"Oh!" Arthur shot up, a glimmer in his eye. Had it worked? He looked out the window to see you inspecting a flat tire. "Well, I can't go to work like this," you pouted. "I'll just take the bus and call someone to come fix it tomorrow." He face-palmed. That wasn't supposed to happen. "No matter, flats happen all the time," he assured himself. "This next time you won't get off so easy, __________."
Arthur was in the kitchen cutting up vegetables for tonight's dinner: Ratatouille. "Oh, but (best friend's name), he makes the best food! It's impossible to believe how lucky I got when I decided to date him!" you gushed on the phone, hugging Arthur's waist before heading over to the living room.
Arthur gave an evil smirk and held the knife behind his head. This time for sure, he thought. He pulled back and let the knife travel its deadly path towards your head.
You saw a grape on the ground. "Oh, what's this?" You bent over to pick it up, the knife missing you by a hair. "Arthur, are we having--" You said the knife sticking to the wall. "Arthur! Are you okay?" you asked, rushing over to him. "Why is that knife on the wall?"
Arthur choked. How could he have missed?! "Ah, sorry 'bout that, love. It must have slipped my hand."
"It's okay, but please be a little more careful, sweetheart."
"Y-yeah... Excuse me, I have to check something outside." He walked through the back door and kicked the fence as hard as he could, making a huge hole. "WHAT THE BLOODY FUCK WAS THAT?!" he shouted, rage emitting from his every pore. "HOW THE FUCK DID I MISS?! That stupid broad knows black magic, she does! DAMN IT ALL!!"
"Arthur, I'll be taking a bath, okay?" you informed your lover happily.
He smiled up at you. "Sure." An ingenious idea ran through his head.
He waited patiently behind the bathroom door. He heard you flush the toilet, but the water for the tub was not running yet. He began to pace back and forth, waiting for the loud noise to make his entrance. Finally, after a few minutes, his cue came along. He opened the door a crack and noticed you facing the tub, your back to the door. Perfect. He crawled up behind you and took hold of your waist, earning him a pleasureful yelp on your part.
"Arthur! You scared me!" you giggled. You turned in his grasp to face him. "I have the most wonderful news, darling."
He looked confused. He was about to drown you, you were supposed to scream for your life! "Er, what is it, love?"
You bit your lip and smiled, holding up a thin white stick made of plastic. On the LED screen, it said in clear black letters PREGNANT. The color fell from Arthur's face. Pregnant. What the hell? A fluttery feeling hit his stomach. He slowly let you go and sat down on the sink. "P-pregnant?" he stuttered. He breathed. His mixed emotions sending his head spinning. "That's.... That's fantastic!" He rushed up and carried you in his arms, spinning you around a few times. He had never felt so happy in his life!
After the uncomfortable wave of Euphoria subsided, Arthur stared at your sleeping face lit up by the moonlight. "You may have the child, if you so wish," he murmured gently, whisking away a few stands of hair from your face. "But once this is over, your life will be mine to toy with once again."